Nutrition

The more I hear from doctors about the nutrition, the more I am certain that our bodies are programmed for suicide. We drool, dream and splurge on all the foods - the pastries, the burgers, and all the deep-fried goodies - which doctors say will destroy your body's plumbing. Ever really had any ecstatic dreams about biting into a bitter-gourd or chomping on some greens?

I can still remember that one time I went on a diet. If I ever forget it for a moment, the smell of boiling cabbage can bring back the memories - along with an irresistible urge to barf. Thanks to the fact that the day started with cabbage soup, was punctuated with cabbage soup throughout, and - you guessed it - had ended in a glorious crescendo of cabbage soup, while on that diet. Tell me, if you ever had to spend a week splurging on samosas, say, do you suppose the smell of them would make you feel like throwing up later? Would that period give you nightmares, which you wake up screaming from, or live on as a joyous memory akin to your first date (unless, of course, your first date WAS a nightmare).

But, then, can we really believe what the doctors say? There may be - there possibly are - doctors who do studies without a prima facie idea of the point that they intend to prove. If they do exist, they probably get no funding for their studies and, if they do get funded, their studies probably get drowned out. An over-statement, perhaps, but just hear me out to know why I feel that way. (It is not merely because I want to enjoy my pastries without guilt-tripping).

If I said that 15% of the population of India goes on a vacation abroad once a year, do you seriously expect that there is a 15% chance of your servant maid announcing a trip to Paris next year? No? Why not - she could be one of that 15%, couldn't she? After all, when they start quoting study reports saying 85% of Indian population suffers from lack of nutrition in food, you rush out with palpitations to buy that health food, which will help you avoid malnutrition, not bothering to check what the percentage is for people who can afford the nutrition YOU can afford. Do you stop to ask if how many of that 85% actually belong to the class of people who can afford these health foods, before going down on your knees thanking god for the kind favors that the manufacturers are doing to a suffering populace?

When the first quip was made about 'White lies, lies and statistics', they really had no idea HOW useful statistics can be. If you use the proper methods, you can bring it out to be anything you want and use it to prove any point. And THAT is one big reason why anything professionals say has become totally vitiated and unbelievable. Professionals, including doctors, can be only as good as the theory they are taught; and the theory is only as good as the integrity of the people who massage the data to support the theory.

Having proved that doctors cannot be relied upon (and, thereby, ensured that I can dine off Alu tikkis and samosas tonight without guilt-tripping? Yes!!!), I cannot still refrain from worrying about them. It is true that when they say something is not good for health, I can be sure that the damn thing will not rise in price like a helium balloon. The problem IS with those things that these chaps SAY are good for health. One month before the dratted thing is being practically given away and now, presto, you have to hock your family jewels to buy it. For example, there was a time when jaggery was a third as expensive as sugar and look now!

Alas! NOW they are making noises about the benefits of dal-chawaal! God knows what stratosphere the prices of rice and dal are going to reach now! (AND, soon, they will be reporting 88% malnutrition in India and selling more health-foods!)