Good Parenting?

Yeah, yeah, I know that you guys are sniggering at my writing anything at all about parenting. Though why you should is a mystery since I am certain to have been at the receiving end of parenting - good or bad. And, in all the whole wide world, the ones who are the most vocal about ANYTHING are those who perceive themselves as victims of that thing - administration, leadership, whatever - and are also not the ones who have ever had to do it. AND the conviction about knowing what's wrong with it is the strongest with those who never have had to DO it. So, why should I not talk of parenting with equal conviction, given that I have not had to do it at all?

But then, by now you should know that I have always a readymade recourse to lean back on when it comes to pontificating about anything I do not really know. (Yeah, yeah, that means almost everything. Do you need to belabor the obvious?) Of course, I'm talking of Tiru.

Thanthai magarkaattru nandri avayatthu mundhi irupaach cheyal - Tirukkural

The greatest boon that a father may grant is to make his son foremost among the learned - Loose Translation

Now THAT, I suppose, is a laudable goal for a father - to educate his children so that they have respect in an assembly of the wise. (Yes, Tiru does talk of only fathers in this context. What can I say, he lived in patriarchal times. Just take the essence of his ideas without outraging on the patriarchy.)

The problem, though, is that education means different things to different people. As in, there was a time when education meant knowing literature and philosophy; now education is useful only if it renders you employable which, essentially, seems to exclude literature and philosophy. There was a time when engineering was education and a camera was for fun; now...you get the picture.

Most parents DO strive to get their children to a space where they are respected by the wise in Society. The problem is only that parents think that they know best about WHAT sort of education will help them achieve their target. Which very seldom seems to vibe with what the children themselves want.

And not just that. It is probably the children who know what's best to get them that respect these days. With rapidly changing technology, parents could well be attempting to educate their children in exactly those areas which will be rendered redundant by AI/ML/what-have-you.

So exactly what are parents to do? Leave children to their own devices? Perhaps.

The only thing that parents CAN help inculcate in their children is character. So, instead of picking the area in which the children should gain the respect of their peers, parents can just stick to...

Teaching them to pursue excellence in whatever area they choose to work.