Patience wins?

The problem with advice is that it, almost invariably, runs counter to what you want to do. (I have said it before? Well, then, the other problem with advice is that it is not that you do not KNOW it. It is just that you find it tough to put it in PRACTICE.) There is no point in crying about it to the philosopher expounding it. He'd only say that, if it were easy, everyone in the world would be a huge success. It IS the difficulty that makes success rare. AND, if success were common, why then, you'd all be calling it failure, no?

So, it should not be shocking that Tiru says this...

Oruththaarkku orunaalai inbam poruththaarkku ponrun thunaiyum pugazh - Tirukkural

The joy of the ill-tempered lasts but a day; the even-tempered achieve everlasting fame - Loose Translation

The literal translation is probably 'the patient' not 'the even-tempered' but, in this context, I feel that the latter is more what Tiru meant than the former. That is more because of how we visualise a patient person. You tend to see the patient person as someone who gets yelled at and put upon and bears with all that with a smile. AND such a person is seen as a victim, a...loser. Tiru is certainly not lauding the idea of someone who submits to all unjustice without demur. No, Tiru is talking of something else.

Have you ever seen an argument between a irate person and a calm chappie? The angry chap gets red in the face, shouts, calls the other names and, in general, is trying to be hurtful. The calm guy talks reasonably, ignores all insults and is capable of repeating his arguments without letting the other guy get under his skin. AND, in the nature of all such arguments, it always ends inconclusively and the irate chap thinks he has won it because he got in the most insults. Neither of the two combatants change their opinions but if you took a poll of the audience, in the event that they were previously undecided, which point of view do you think would have prevailed. More to the point, which of the two combatants would have gained respect?

Now THAT is what Tiru is talking about. AND he is talking about the sort of character that can stay stable and unmoved in the face of provocation and keep doing its thing resolutely. To get impatient and angry is also to conceded defeat when you do not forge ahead with the speed that you want; to be thrown off by opposition and be unable to persist in carrying people along; to give in to the short term satisfaction of giving the other a piece of your mind instead of bringing him around to your way of thinking. None of that helps you to be successful.

'Turning the other cheek' does not merely mean the physical action. If the physical action is coupled with resentment and suppressed anger, it will only lead to a devastating counter-action later on. What it does mean is the ability to turn the other cheek WITHOUT feeling that resentment, that anger. It is the ability to shrug off the intended insult, to show the other person that they do not have the ability to affect you, to hurt you. For, after all, resentment and anger arise only from feeling hurt, no? (AND, if you are a SAINT, to also feel empathy for the other person and his own hurt, his own anger. But then, if you WERE a saint, you'd not need to read this to know that.)

Lasting success only comes to those who have complete control over their emotions. THAT is what Tiru thinks will lead to everlasting fame. Now, is that what the management gurus call EQ these days?