Let down by feminism

When I first heard of Feminism, I doubt whether there were many in the world who rejoiced about it as much as I did. Here, at last, was a social movement that would make all my dreams come true - or so I thought. I must, unwillingly, admit that it has been a let-down to me so far though I have still not given up hope.

I wanted to be wooed with chocolates and flowers (cigars and cognac for preference but there is a weird animal, called 'political correctness', loose in the world which gets in the way of everything we enjoy) by a woman. I wanted billets doux written to me, even with mis-spelt English and bad rhyming. I wanted a woman to take me on a cruise on her yacht on the Aegean, go down on one knee before me on a romantic moonlit night, slip a Rolex on my wrist and propose to me. It is because no woman has, yet, done this to me that I am still single - and still waiting. What is the purpose of Feminism, pray, if it will not even satisfy such a simple dream?

Oh, by the way, if you were wondering about why any woman would WANT to do all this for ME, I have a compelling argument. I offer one thing that no handsome hulk can offer - there will never be a day of anxiety about what if age robs me of my looks. One can lose only what one possesses in the first place. (Remember this irresistible attraction of mine whenever doubt raises its ugly head in your mind when you read the words to come)

I suppose it was too much to expect that the Mother-in-Law would tell me,"In our family, sons-in-law do not go to work. How can a woman live in self-respect if she lives off her husband's earnings?" and scupper any ideas of my venturing into the world of slogging. (She would not have to try too hard - or even try). But I could, at least, expect a modern woman to tell me indulgently,"Go to work if you want to - although I earn enough for the two of us." Not happening. I suppose for this we men are to blame since we developed that ingenious argument that "In today's world, both are needed to earn if a family is to have a decent life"

But, hang on, wait a minute. I was intending to accept only a woman who proposed to me on HER yacht on a cruise in the Aegean, right? Could such a woman really NEED her spouse to earn? So, what is all this nonsense about "It takes two to pay all the EMIs"?

That, by the way, neatly disposes off the need to cook, change the bedspreads, air the curtains and all that. We would have enough money to hire people to do all that. All I would have to do was daintily pass on the cups of tea when people come home and I could just about do that. (Daintily? There, I suppose, I go a bit too far. Alright, drop the 'daintily' there). I think I can also rise up to the challenge of giving my wife a hard time about forgetting our anniversary (provided I can remember it myself).

Daydreams! Feminism has still not got to a point where my dreams can all be satisfied. It leaves me still single and waiting in forlorn hope that things will get better in my lifetime. I hope, at least, that a future me will be in a position to have these dreams satisfied.

Meanwhile....I wait....