When
first we experience what we think of as love it is by and large a feeling. The
only thought, if anything, that crosses our mind is “How wonderful life would
be for me if (s)he is my spouse”. This romantic love is more an experience of
feeling happy with even the daydreams of spending time with the loved one, one
of taking pleasure in stealing surreptitious glances and secret smiles – not to
mention the clichéd murmuring of sweet nothings in each other’s ears. A love
that stays put at this stage if it turns to marriage is more likely to be
heart-break for one if not for both.
When
love matures, consideration for the other gains more importance. Now, in
addition to thinking about how happy your love will make you, you also start
taking pleasure in making your significant other happy. When love starts making
you think in terms of actively taking pleasure in making the other happy – and
not just as a means to an end – it is mature love.
Yet!
There is a sort of love that is not given to the ordinary people to feel. When
all the giving can only be a one-way street, due to external circumstances, and
when the life that you end up leading is one of unremitting drudgery and
deprivation, it takes a different order of love to transmute such a life into
one of happiness because you are living with your love.
I came to know of such a woman in the recent past. A woman, whose husband was crippled within a year of an arranged marriage and
whose parents urged her to divorce him and closed their doors on her because
she would not. She not only stayed with him, nursing him and helping him try to
earn a living but also disdained any description of her life as one of
sacrifice.
That
is the only real life story that makes me want to write about it. I do not know
any of the characters personally and, thus, were I to write it the characters
in my story may end up bearing no resemblance to the real life characters.
This is my entry for the HarperCollins–IndiBlogger Get Published contest, which is run with inputs from Yashodhara Lal andHarperCollins India.
This is my entry for the HarperCollins–IndiBlogger Get Published contest, which is run with inputs from Yashodhara Lal andHarperCollins India.
Well thats the promise we make in front of the people and GOd who witness the marriage..
ReplyDeleteand I respect that lady for doing that.. the husband could have had an accident later on too, and well I would liek to ask the parents would they have said the same had she had an accident and the husband left her..
Love is weird no one knows what it is for sure , everyone has their own perception of it
but i think Lucky are the people who GIve and Get love
Bikram's
Very lucky indeed, Bikramjit!
DeleteGoing by the fact that the parents refused to help her through all her struggles, I am not too sure that they would have blamed the husband for leaving her - I am incapable of thinking the way such people think. To even try makes me feel dirty!
what i liked most is that she didn't like her life to be considered as one of sacrifice, many would have.
ReplyDeletei would love to assume that stealing surreptitious glances and secret smiles still exist in current era
That is the part that moved me too, Debs! That she did not think that her life was a life of sacrifice! And most would not even have chosen to live that life given a choice!
DeleteThat stealing surreptitious glances and secret smiles is for the period before the chap gets his courage up to propose :) I am sure a few such people will always exist in any era :)
I have been fortunate enough to know one such couple who stayed together and very much in love even when disability came in the way..and as a celebration of their love I did a post on them quite some time back...@ http://titli15081977.blogspot.com/2012/02/valentines-day.html...
ReplyDeletea couple of months ago, she passed away and his parting words moved me even more...and an epilouge followed... and it is my belief that when love is so great, even death cannot do you apart...
Which is how i feel too
DeleteThe love that gives without expecting anything in return, not even a halo around the head is what makes it special and almost divine. Eager to see how you write about such a love. Knowing your style, I am sure it will be poignant.
ReplyDeleteThanks Zephyr! Hope I can live up to expectations
DeleteVery poignant and touching ...
ReplyDeleteThanks Sridevi
DeleteReally looking forward to reading your story, CS. A definite "like" from me.
ReplyDeleteThanks KayEm!
DeleteWonder if I can 'like' twice!! This is such an endearing take on a love story. One that perplexes the reader...... you've got my vote
ReplyDeleteThanks Nirvana! The lady who actually lived that life is the one who deserves all the accolades
DeleteLoved it good heart mesmerizing story :)
ReplyDeleteAll kudos ought to go to the lady who lived that selfless life
DeleteSo sad and this is real life for some couples, all the best :)
ReplyDeleteThanks Ghazala
DeleteOk, so I don't particularly care for love stories at all (even though the one-way love story that you have alluded to sounds extremely real and, therefore, highly compelling), I would be the first in line to buy your book for the prose that I know it will offer! H-C had better not get the winners of this contest wrong!
ReplyDeleteGood luck with the contest :)
Thanks for the vote of confidence Rickie!
DeleteWhere do we see this kinda love in todays times? Amazing!
ReplyDeletePlease read mine and vote if you think it should make its way into the anthology
http://www.indiblogger.in/getpublished/idea/248/
Thanks Rinzu!
DeleteVery Very interesting. I cant wait for this story to take its shape. Your plot line does promise a very realistic love story. All the best CS! I am voting for this!
ReplyDeleteThanks Kirti! Great to hear from you after so long!
DeleteI remember this story, Suresh and would love you to write about it. Because I do not know how people can have such steadiness of spirit to keep that flame going. Maybe your writing would help keep hope and faith alive...
ReplyDeleteExactly that story that you remember, Bhavana! Good to hear that you would love me to write it. Let us hope I have sufficient talent to do justice to that wonderful woman.
DeleteI would love to meet such people where humanity exists even today! The best part about this was not looking at it as a sacrifice. This is a beautiful premise which needs to be told and shared Suresh! Best wishes for the contest.
ReplyDeleteYou can understand now why i said that I shall tell this story anyway!
DeleteSome stories define love and it looks like that kind. All the best Sir. Would love to read their journey.
ReplyDeleteWould love to write it Saru!
DeleteBeautiful premise!!! ANd a very real one, this is the love that is real and for keeps. Like you said, there is a huge difference between mature love and fairy-tale love. I had written a post on Valentine's Day last year, elaborating the reality of love (http://amrutam-nopen.blogspot.in/2012/02/love-is-when.html. You might find some of your thoughts mirrored in that post!
ReplyDeleteJust voted, I would love to read this story in your words, given how gently and thoughtfully you handle such topics :)Good Luck for the contest!!
Thanks Amruta! The story is about a real life woman, who lived that life - though my story may not entirely mirror the happenings in her life.
DeleteHi CS,
ReplyDeletePoint well made, there's no denying the fact. Any individual in today's time would instantly abandon such an individual who was unfortunate to have lost their limbs. At such times of loss, it is very normal for people to abandon such persons.
Your story idea is absolutely inspiring and should come as a lesson for today's generation which believes in quick fixes and jump from one relation to another.
Good initiative taken up you. This story needs to be told.
My vote goes to you, wish you luck :):):)
Do check out my entry for Get Published.
Regards
Jay
My Entry to Indiblogger Get Published
Thanks Jay!
DeleteThat is such wonderful example. Makes me feel spirited. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteThat was a most wonderful woman Abra! And an inspiration to all of us about how noble love can become.
Deletea nice start!.. all the best for the contest!
ReplyDeleteThe contest is all done and dusted, Sahithya, and I did not win :)
Delete